Despair
by Bonnie Salvatore
Summary: He left. Enough said.
1. Chapter 1

So i watched the new episode last night. It wasn't that bad…but still it was HORRIBLE. Why? BECAUSE ELLIOT LEFT! THATS WHY. I don't care that the whole crew stayed. I don't care that Alex and Casey are back. I just want Elliot. With Olivia. We all do. Heres a new story or a one-shot I don't know yet. It depends on the episodes.

"We got a ten-thirty four on Waverley." Munch announced glancing at Olivia and seeing her sigh "Fin take Rollins."

"No. I'll go. Give me five and we'll roll." Olivia interrupted.

"Ok." Fin said, gathering his papers.

Olivia nodded and headed to the locker rooms. On the way she stopped, looked at one of the doors to the interrogation room, and slipped inside closing the door shut behind her. She leaned against the wall and started to shake. Started to break down. She couldn't control it, couldn't stop it. And why should she? Her _partner_, her best _friend _handed his papers in. He wasn't coming back. She would never solve another case with him. Never would see his smile, or hear his laugh . Or see him take his anger out on the perp. See him across her desk, see him question a victim, never take another break with her. Hot tears poured down her cheeks and she leaned against the window crying but not making one sound expect for a faint whimper.

Three hours later. At her house.

Olivia shut the door behind her and locked it. She turned on the lights and stood there looking at her empty apartment. She should be at the precinct hunting down leads. With Elliot. But that was never going to happen again right?

She sighed and went to take a shower. When she was done, she put on some pajamas avoiding the old NYPD shirt that belonged to Elliot which she never had returned. She pulled her hair up in a pony-tail and went to order pizza. If Elliot was still at work he would be with her right now with pizza and beers. They would discuss the case, lash out there opinions, then talk about other things. It was these simple moments she loved, that she cherished. But now everything changed. Her world was in shambles because he left her. Left her there, left her by her self trying to save the world. She had to talk to him. She picked up the phone and hit repeat. This time it didn't even ring it just went straight to voicemail.

"How could you do this to me El? Why didn't you tell me? Why?" She yelled losing control and threw the phone across the room. It broke.

Suddenly she felt a hatred furious angry at him. How could he be so _selfish_? How could he just leave her like this? With no warning? She grabbed her remote on the coffee table and threw it. She threw everything in reach. Making a colorful shimmering crystals all over the floor. She sunk down on the floor crying.

The doorbell rang and she wiped her eyes and payed for the pizza. She set it down and took a slice. After she ate she felt a little better, and more calm. She cleaned up the mess. Then cleaned her whole apartment. She wiped traces and reminders of him out of there dumping everything into a black trash bag then stuffing it in the back of her closet. Olivia grabbed a blanket, a pillow, and a couple of beers and spent the rest of the night on the couch. Her heart in a million of pieces just like the glass in the bottom of the trash.

SHould I continue as a story? Yes, no? Review! And Olivia. When you cried, my heart broke down with you. Stay strong.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews, guys. You know it makes me happy.

Chapter 2

"I'm sorry about Elliot." Alex said.

"Me too." Liv said, her heart twisting at the sound of his name.

Its been two weeks. Two long stressful weeks. He hasn't called back. Or emailed, messaged, video chatted. Not once.

Meanwhile everything was changing at the precinct. Now not only _one_ detective was there, but a new one. And he was going to be her new partner. Her _replacement. _But how could anyone replace Elliot? How could anyone replace the unbreakable bond, that was between them?

She was at Elliot's desk with a box. Cragen told her to clear if for the new guy Nick Amaro. She picked up books and a folded american flag and put it in. She tidied the inside throwing away old chewed up pens, some gum wrappers, and pieces of trash. After she was done, she looked at the desk and picked up the picture. The picture of Elliot and his son Eli. He looked so happy. She felt the familiar hot wetness at her eyelids, and she took a deep breath trying to steady herself. When she did, she put the picture in the box and closed the lid.

Fin watched her, his heart heavy. He knew she was taking it hard, and he felt her pain. Even though Elliot could be a asshole, he still regarded him as a good friend and was sad he was gone. A cop came to him with a piece of paper.

After reading it he walked over to Liv "We got a case."

Liv shook her thoughts away and picked up the box and looked at the paper. "Thats for disorderly conduct how did it end up in SVU?"

Liv was at home nursing another beer a couple of nights later. Alone. The case was the usual expect it involved a couple of successful basketball players. She didn't bother being nice to Amaro. Or to Rollins who was trying so hard to please everyone.

She took another long sip. She never drank this much. Two tops. It always reminded her of her mother when she drank, which wasn't a good thought. Sighing she put the beer down. Cragen was being on her case telling her to do things that she wasn't ready for. It was annoying and frustrating. Couldn't he see she was in pain? That she couldn't let go of Elliot that easily?

Amaro tried to be nice to her earlier but she brushed him off. Everyone around her was talking about how he was a nice handsome gentleman. She laughed. Handsome? Even though he was tall, muscular, had brown eyes and wavy dark brown hair, he was ok. Not her type. But she knew she was lying. Knew that the only reason she was being a bitch to Amaro was so he could leave, so she didn't have to deal with the work of a new partner. She couldn't work with anyone anymore. Fin and John yes, but it wasn't the same. No she needed _him_. She needed the one person that had broke her heart and left her vulnerable. Elliot. And that was never going to change. And damn whoever tried.

Sorry its short guys, i'm still basing this on the episodes. I'l see how it goes between liv and the new guy, and try to make a good story out of it. Thanks again for the reviews! Check out my other stories and review if you can :)

-R


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